Avoiding Emotional Eruptions:

Consider emotional issues and how to deal with them in the mediation.  Sometimes, especially when family, neighbor or partnership relationships are involved, the participants may be best served if they are separated during mediation. When faced with this situation, notify the mediator before the mediation, so the mediator can handle the separation smoothly. Hot tempers at the beginning of the mediation require the mediator to spend time cooling them down. 

Consider using objective descriptions of events and facts rather than emotionally charged allegations in your brief and oral presentations which can rekindle emotion from your client.  Remember the mediator is not a judge or arbitrator – you do not need to get the mediator invested with the emotion of your client’s position. 
Prepare your client to resolve the controversy.  Help them understand that this may be the only opportunity where they will control of the process and the outcome. 
There are two basic reasons matters fail to resolve at mediation: ignorance and anger. Ignorance can arise, for example, when a participant does not understand their own case or the other side’s.  Ignorance can arise when a participant does not understand the law and how it will be applied in their matter.  Anger can be focused on the other participant(s), the situation from which the controversy arises and sometimes arise from ignorance.  Try to understand what you must do to educate your client and why s/he may be angry. 

More tips

  © 2006, Phelps Mediation Services